Questions & answers
Things people ask me. Things I ask myself. Honest answers to both.
Do you have to be a good writer to be a good storyteller?
No. Some of the best storytellers I know can barely write a coherent email. Storytelling is a spoken, lived, relational thing first. Writing is just one way to do it — and honestly, not always the best way. If you can hold a room with a story, you're a storyteller. The writing is a separate skill you can develop later.
What's the most common mistake people make when telling a story?
Starting too early. People feel like they need to give you all the context before they can get to the story. So they explain the background, and the background to the background, and by the time they get to the actual thing that happened, you've already checked out. Start in the middle. Start where something is already happening. You can fill in context as you go.
Is storytelling manipulative?
It can be. So can logic, data, and a really good PowerPoint. Any tool for persuasion can be used well or badly. The question isn't whether storytelling is manipulative — it's whether you're using it to help people understand something true, or to get them to believe something false. That's an ethics question, not a storytelling question.
How do you know when a story is finished?
When you've answered the question you raised at the beginning. Every story opens a question — will they make it? Will she find out? Can he change? The story is finished when that question is resolved. Not necessarily answered the way you hoped, but resolved. Closed. If you're still circling, the story isn't done.
Can you teach someone to be a better storyteller?
Yes, absolutely. Not everyone will become great at it — some people have a natural gift that's hard to replicate. But almost everyone can get meaningfully better with attention and practice. The fundamentals aren't mysterious. They're learnable. That's the whole premise of this site.
What's the difference between a story and an anecdote?
An anecdote is something that happened. A story is something that happened and meant something. 'I was late to work because my car wouldn't start' is an anecdote. 'I was late to work because my car wouldn't start, and standing on the sidewalk waiting for the tow truck I realized I'd been dreading going in for months' — that's a story. The meaning is what makes it a story.
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